I found out I was pregnant in September 2020. I remember I could not stand any strong smells... except for cleaning products, the blue fairy liquid smelt so good and whatever they cleaned the floors with in my workplace. I avoided the staff kitchen as much as possible.
After my first baby was born, I had some worries about birth. I knew I wanted a sibling for my daughter and I couldn't wait to have them but the giving birth part was playing in my mind, as was all the COVID concerns at the time.
I decided to take ownership of this and looked into hypnobirthing. I had dabbled with hypnobirthing before my first baby but I didn't buy in it really. I picked an online course and signed up.
I listened to birthing tracks, I was given 4 with the course I signed up with.
It was also super helpful as it was based around COVID and restrictions and over coming these fears in your mind.
I wasn't planning any particular birth, but I just knew I wanted to be more in control than I had been previously. A water birth would have been nice, but I was feeling confident in myself and my body ability to birth my baby.
My husband and I joked that baby would come while my first was in nursery all day and then I joked that baby wouldn't come until I had clean hair. (Washing my hair while pregnant became a mighty task that I always put off as much as possible!)
So on the 20th May, daughter at nursery all day, I did my best to take some 'me time'. This meant eating chocolate in bed and watching movies. I watched 10 things I hate about you, a movie I could probably act out line for line!
For lunch, I ordered a foot-long, Italian BMT with Southwest sauce, my favourite at the time.
I then watched the movie Grease, followed my Frozen 2. Frozen 2 wasn't holding my interest so I decided to finally go wash my hair and get a shower. Meanwhile it was time to go pick up my first from nursery, so my husband went.
I got out of the shower, dressing gown and all and the door bell went. I went downstairs and sure enough... it was amazon. I went back up stairs to start to dry my hair and as I got to the top step.. gush. 'Have I just wet myself??' I thought to myself. I looked down and started a little laugh to myself, my waters had just went. I then became vaguely aware of period pain type pain.
I phoned the hospital to let them know my waters had went, and they asked if I could come in to be checked. I dried my hair as quickly as I could and my stomach started to feel nervous, but excited.
My husband came home with my little one and I told him my waters had went, with a big smile n my face. He phoned his parents to come to look after our little one. They live about 35 minutes away and I'm not really sure what I was doing in that time. Probably cuddling my daughter and hearing all about nursery that day.
My mother in law told me after that she noticed how calm and relaxed I was about it all. We drove to the hospital and again I became aware of period pain pains.
We arrived and I went in by myself as your birth partner was not allowed in until you were in active labour. I had a COVID test and then a vaginal exam. “5CM. You are ready to go up to the Active birthing Centre.” at this stage I was offered a sweep and looking back I am not entirely sure why, but I politely declined. I phoned my husband to come in and then went to the bathroom.
I wasn't aware but the lovely midwife pointed out how well I was using my breathing and I think had she not seen I was 5cm she might not have thought I was in labour.
We were brought up to a lovely room, with galaxy lighting on the ceiling. I found myself swaying a lot, and going through all the moves I was taught by Eleanor, my pregnancy yoga instructor (no wall sits though!) I had the bed raised up so I could lean over it with my elbows.
I was told there were ketones in my sample and that I needed to eat. They made me tea and toast. The concentration to stop and try to drink tea or even chew the toast was too much. Jelly babies, jelly babies were what I could manage and they were a bit of a distraction too. I also started using gas and air. The whole time I was listening to my hypnobirthing track, reminded me to breathe. My husband was amazing too at reminding me to make low 'umm' noises and to keep my jaw relaxed.
The birthing pool had been full of water but as I was ready to get in they realised it was a little too cold, so as I just got in, they let some water out and attempted to fill with warmer water... only it wouldn't fill. Meanwhile I can feel that my daughters head is super low and I'm basically in the water holding myself up so as not to sit on her head? LOL (my arms were so sore for 2 days after!)
“I'm sorry, you're going to have to get out, the water level isn't safe”
Oh right, okay. So I waddled up the steps to get out of the pool, looking like john Wayne walking and holding on to my husbands shoulders.
I had just stepped on to dry land and the midwife, very calmly asked where I would like to give birth.
“here! Here where I stand!” was my not so calm reply. Looking back I felt that no one saw the sense of urgency, so I followed this up with “ring of fire! Ring of fire!” and then proceed to ask the midwife to catch my baby.
And there she was born. I waddled over to the bed and she was placed on my chest and I was so fucking happy and relived and felt like a birthing badass.
